“Everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart” Matthew 5:28
The first time you looked at another woman with lust your marriage began its decay. My decay started on our honeymoon, and would go on for 17 years until I became free and finally learned what it meant to love the woman I said I loved from the beginning.
It affects every area of your life, your marriage, your family, and others around you. It affects your job, your relationships with people and your valuable time. Our wives need to be loved, cherished and honored within our marriages. We said all the right things to become married, but did we mean them if we were trapped before our wedding day? But you probably didn’t even know you were trapped!
The running argument between husband and wife has been, women need more “romance” and men need, well, you know. All we think about is the bedroom and it seems all they think about is, being loved. Where is the balance? If there is no balance your marriage with suffer.
Our wives don’t want to go to the bedroom for several reasons. She believes you’ve seen enough as she’s watched you stare at one woman after the other. You thought you were sly enough for her not to notice, but believe me, they miss NOTHING! This seemingly little act carries a heavy weight in you wife’s heart. It destroys her self-worth, her hunger for you and your ability to give her what she really needs.
It’s so simple that I’m wondering why it took me 17 years to understand all of this. All your wife needs is; your eyes, your heart, your hugs, your laughs. Just plain old you, sold out to her and only her. TV, magazine racks, computers, telephones, beaches, and the like, have for too long been places to fill our desires to lust after women. If we keep allowing these to infect our minds throughout our marriage, how much will be left for the one we say we love?
Author: Erick Hurt
From a slave to sin–to freedom in Christ (Galatians 5:1). From an abusive husband verbally and physically–to loving my wife as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). Now an Elder at Family Bible Church, I speak, teach, and preach with the same passion I once had for sin. I work as a volunteer for Setting Captives Free ministry as a mentor and mentor coordinator helping people become freed from the grip of sin. Visit www.settingcaptivesfree.com.