“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church” (Ephesians 5:25). Sometime ago this became my life verse for my marriage. I memorized this passage and mediated on it on a regular basis. I thought, wow, how could I ever love my wife this way? I mean, this is Jesus we are talking about here. The more I have thought on this verse the more it has given me the chance to live it out. No, I have not lived it out completely or as faithfully as I would like, but nevertheless it is still something to be pursued.
So what does it look like for a husband to love his wife as “Christ loved the church?” The first thing we could notice here is–it was never about Jesus–but it was always about his bride. Before you think you have to give up everything in your marriage as Jesus gave up himself, oh wait, isn’t that the Christian life? Aren’t we to die to self so that we might live to Christ?
Men, we must be willing to be bruised by our beloved wives. We must be willing to keep our mouths muzzled. We must be willing to love to new depths that bring us into harmony with the kind of love Jesus had for the church. I remember always telling Sylvia (my wife) when she offended me so we could have peace and tranquility and bla, bla, bla! In striving to love a new way with greater depth, I have found it requires one to be bruised. Isn’t that how Jesus Christ loved the church?
We don’t have to win every argument, or bring up every detail. In loving our wives as Christ loved the church, however, we will discover our wives willing to love back more than we had dreamed. The respect you have desired will become a reality. This joy of loving without expecting in return is beautiful. If your motivation is to gain in return then maybe you are not ready to love your wife as Christ loved the church. In order for us to be ready, we must look at the last part of the verse we started with. “And gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25).
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25).
Let that sink in! Are you willing to live it out?
Author: Erick Hurt
From a slave to sin–to freedom in Christ (Galatians 5:1). From an abusive husband verbally and physically–to loving my wife as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). Now an Elder at Family Bible Church, I speak, teach, and preach with the same passion I once had for sin. I work as a volunteer for Setting Captives Free ministry as a mentor and mentor coordinator helping people become freed from the grip of sin. Visit www.settingcaptivesfree.com.