Did I Marry A Rubber-Necker?

Did I Marry A Rubber-Necker?

It doesn’t always start with dirty magazines. It can start with the magazines that are in your home now. The ones we order out of. The ones we subscribe to. Catalogs of women wearing bras leave much for the imagination. Sears, JCPenny, and others were among the first magazines that captivated many young people. Today, “Health magazines” give you access to pornography in the form of their so called “Better sex, how to enhance your sex life.” These are the magazines young people of today are seeing on a regular basis. It doesn’t start with the dirty ones, but it can end up there. There’s plenty of dirt in the magazines right on the shelves of our local stores or in your home. Even places that consider themselves to be “family oriented” are falling short when it comes to the protection of young minds.

I hit the jackpot when I was young. My cousin and I were at a Country Club (my relatives liked to play golf and belonged to this place) snooping around and found a whole stack of dirty magazines. I couldn’t wait to start looking at them, one by one, slowly taking in all my eyes could handle. There must have been thirty or forty of them! To my disappointment we didn’t stay long, but were soon on our way to the pool area where I could continue to defile with my eyes one girl after the other. These habits are difficult to break, like any addiction, we need help. It certainly is no surprise that taking in thousands upon thousands of pictures through our eyes doesn’t go away over night.

One day after our wedding day, while on our honeymoon, my wife caught me starring at women while walking on the beach in Hawaii. While enjoying our time together I turned and noticed the beach was loaded with beautiful women. My look went from a long stare, to lust, then to embarrassment when I noticed my wife was thirty feet in front of me. I can tell you that any kind of romantic encounter was nullified by my actions. When our wife’s heart is constantly trampled on by our selfishness, is there any wonder why they do not desire intimacy from us? They have great eye sight and instinct. To my amazement they can see in front, behind, and to each side simultaneously. They have this strange sense that say’s, “your husband is looking again.” But we look at her and smile as if to say, “if she only knew.” SHE DOES KNOW! And this is the reason she doesn’t want to get close to you! Always looking and waiting for the next woman to lust after. Back and forth we go, looking, scanning for the next image to fill our altered minds.

This scanning causes our hearts to race, our minds to clutter, and our wives to ask, “did I marry this rubber-necker?” He didn’t seem to have this rubber-neck when we were dating. What is the cause of this disease? Will he ever be cured? We seem to think it is our manly duty to look at women, stare at women, drool over women, all while infecting our minds and sending the continued message that men are pigs. Have you heard this one? “I like to look at women like beautiful art.” And, “I look at women and appreciate them for their beauty.” Oh, okay, now I get it, your right, how dumb of me not to understand. Why don’t you go tell your wife the great news and see how she responds. We can come up with all kinds of excuses to feed our selfish desires. “Everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:27).

Author: Erick Hurt

​From a slave to sin–to freedom in Christ (Galatians 5:1). From an abusive husband verbally and physically–to loving my wife as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). Now an Elder at Family Bible Church, I speak, teach, and preach with the same passion I once had for sin. I work as a volunteer for Setting Captives Free ministry as a mentor and mentor coordinator helping people become freed from the grip of sin. Visit www.settingcaptivesfree.com.


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